Stress - you can’t avoid it, but you can beat it. Make sure you relax, as your life depend on it.

Relaxation should be the easiest thing in the world. You simply call your girlfriend, pick up an Indian takeaway, and flop in front of the telly for a session of Friends or Sienfield. Throw in a bottle of wine and before you know it, you’re snoring on the couch and being dragged off to bed.

That’s how it should be. But how often do you come home on a Friday night to find the house is a mess and the answering machine in meltdown? Instead of putting your feet up, you worry about work and start arguing with your girlfriend. Come Monday morning, you wake up tired and grumpy, feeling as though you haven’t had a weekend, and wondering why you just can’t seem to relax.

If you are suffering from stress, you’ll know that relaxation is not as simple as it sounds. Far from being a passive activity, effective R and R is something that can take a bit of work. You can’t expect instant calm just by lighting a scented candle and playing a CD of whale sounds. Even sleep, while essential, is not enough to relieve deep-seated stress. To get the full benefit of your relaxation time, you actually have to teach your mind and body how to switch off.

Relax, don’t do it.

No-one denies that stress can be a positive force. The thrill of the chase, the pressure to perform and the danger of being caught, are the sort of tensions that keep life interesting. Stress only becomes a problem when it continues at high levels for long periods. That’s when you experience the warning signs of burnout: constant worry, restlessness, depression, fatigue, or the feeling of never being on top form.

You’d think that sensible, consenting adults would know when to call it quits. But we don’t - that’s the problem. We try to juggle busy and demanding jobs with meaningful relationships, active social lives and ever more insane extreme sports. We haven’t learnt that “24/7” is the lifestyle formerly known as Burning the Candle at Both Ends.

What is stress?

The physical symptoms of stress are directly related to the central nervous system. The release of the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol leads to increases in pulse, blood pressure and metabolic rate, preparing your body for the “fight or flight” response that was programmed into our ancestors.

These emergency measures lead to the temporary shutdown of less urgent body functions like digestion, the immune system and sex drive. When stress is prolonged and without relief, more serious symptoms start to occur. There is now convincing scientific evidence that stress can cause illnesses ranging from the common cold and athlete’s foot to irritable bowel syndrome, heart disease and cancer.

It’s very convenient to blame your job, family or bank balance for this unhappy state of affairs. In fact, responsibility for your health and well-being rests squarely with you. It’s a hard pill to swallow, but doctors now say that stress-related illness is largely a consequence of “personal mismanagement” - of refusing to take time off, kick back and chill out. It’s the reason why enlightened doctors are more likely to suggest a course of counselling or remedial stress relief instead of filling out a prescription for tranquilizers.

Before things get to that stage, try a few relaxation techniques. Not only will you save your sanity, you could just save your life.